Being Mama

This is the first year I feel like a mama. According to the photos and my blurry memory, last year at this time I had a precious 3 month old who rarely cried, lit up any room we entered, and was the source of great joy. Therefore, I didn’t really believe she was mine, I was hers, and that the responsibility of my husband and I raising her was a real thing. It felt more like a dream, a good dream, mind you, that I was going to wake up from any day. I suppose the reality of this new life was still quite new. I was adjusting to sleep deprivation, the loss of freedom I was way too attached to, my first real understanding of unconditional love and marriage post-kiddo. It takes time to own any new role I suppose, like waking up the morning after your wedding and seeing your wedding band resting on your finger next to your engagement ring and your sweet hubby snuggled beside you. Like that sweet morning almost four years ago, I’m ever so grateful each day I wake up as Mama, to my little girl singing “row, row, row you boat” or talking about the tree and birds on her wall. It never gets old as I pick her up out of her bed and she hugs me and asks to read some books together. I love sitting with her an hour each morning reading, snuggling, singing as we prepare for our day. 

 

 

There is so much more to being a mama than the hard stuff. Most of us claim great joy, but fill the world with the specific details that make our life sound quite joyless. What I want to hold on to this mother’s day is the feeling of Ellie’s sweet hand in mine as we walk to the park, the memory of peeping at her sleeping face this morning as she napped, and the treasure of the many smiles and laughs we’ve shared in these 15 months together. I’m so thankful to be a mama. I’m thankful that this role is mine.

About Melissa

Melissa is a wife, mama and fan of all things Turkey. Among other adventures, Melissa loves living life in Turkey while raising her daughters. On IstanbulMoms you can hear about her adventures and escapades, tips for success, strategies for untangling the culture, and ideas for enjoying life in Istanbul to the fullest.

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